My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
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