Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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