Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
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