just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
This baby is an asshole
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
