So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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