Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
We left the knife in your bed.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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