I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
God gave him joint rollers for hands
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
