Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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