I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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