fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
