Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
i want to swaddle you in tequila
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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