He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
