Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
