You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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