Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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