1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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