So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
