In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
