P.S. I can't hear my feet
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
My penis needs a shock collar
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
