do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
