Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
The Olympian is in my bed
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
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