do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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