ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
