you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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