ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
