I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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