I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
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