At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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