thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
