That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
