I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
