bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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