blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
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