Michael Bay diarrhea
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I need a beard to bite.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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