OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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