Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
