is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
