I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
