tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
