the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Randomize
