How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
