We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
this is an emotional support booty call
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
