This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
