Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize
