I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
