you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
we made out on top of his cat.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Randomize
