I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
