There was a lot of him and a little penis
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize
