4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize