i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Randomize
